Saturday, December 27, 2008

Forgive, yes - Forget?.......

If you are of a certain age you may remember a WWII movie starring Audie Murphy, my Dad's hero, "TO HELL AND BACK". Hombre, 2008 was HELL and mostly now back, but not so sure even now.....See prior post on my brother Roberto's double lung transplant and eventual 8 month hospital vacation fighting for his life; then my 24 yr. old son assaulted and stabbed in Wilmington by a crack-head - the miracle is that they are both in good shape. The bad news is that my nerves are shot to "Hell". It started w/ an anxiety attack when Roberto was a few days out of surgery and then became darkness about the time Thomas was attacked.

Winston Churchill would call it the "Black dog" and shoo it away with scotch; me I just keep pushing that 1 hr. drive to and back from DC and the 11 hours in between - three years now - toughest assignment of my life. There was a time when I thought of myself as a change-agent,and invincible - very clear on my purpose; then I encountered the mother of all organizational challenges. I just transpired through one of those lifetime events: late Oct/Nov I was visited by the "Black Dog" and he would not leave, not fun sleeping 2 hours a night for a month plus - the mind begins to do things....I found people who were protecting me and I also found some that wanted to annihilate me; glad to forgive, tough to forget. I am myself again, mostly, ready to take us up in 2009 - 25 yrs. riding this horse, I plan on charging into the mass and laying waste and destruction on the competition, but first things first.....I hate to tell you this, but not everyone wants you or your team to succeed, not your fault how they feel, just a reality on the darker side of the envious, the small, the irrelevant. Funny how most people choose their lot through their behaviors - we know this as the leadership model, people will not act inconsistent with their beliefs, then a result is produced, and sometimes it is a negative result - pity.

In the final analysis, your attitude determines your effectiveness in everything, every time! LGL